Another one bites the dust. Cell Phone, that’s what I’m talking about. Son #4’s phone was the latest causality.
The phone company we use probably hates to see us walk in the door. I just know that when they see us coming the conversation is something like “Hey, it’s your turn this time. No, it ain’t, I did it last time. Gotta go to lunch.”
This time a cow stepped on it. The phone fell out of his pocket and without knowing it he scooped it up with the feed he was cleaning up from under the unloader. He then threw the shovelful into the manger. Somehow, the phone ended up into the lot with the cows. When the phone came up missing someone alerted it and low and behold there it was in the poop with the cows.
Another time we were out on a really, really nice boat (actually I would call it a yacht). One of the benefits of having a son who owns a boat brokerage business is occasionally taking one out on the lake. This was a 50 footer something or other and we were out as a family. We were just leaving the slip and Son #2 was walking up to the bow and one of the guide wires caught his phone clip and it dove into the water. For a few seconds he was debating going in after it.
Son #3 somehow managed to drop his from the top of a 110 foot tall Harvestore silo. Yep, pretty much toast.
We don’t know who deserves the credit for this one. While working on a tractor the phone was laid on top of a rear tire. The tractor was fixed and it was time for it to be moved. One problem, no one thought about the phone. It’s kind of hard to punch in the numbers with tire tread embedded in the screen.
I’ll have to fess up to a stupid phone event. While driving down our road I received my first ever text. I was coasting at about 2 miles an hour and was so absorbed in trying to figure it out. I side swiped the neighbor’s mailbox. Mailbox was uninjured; my vehicle has a slight scar.
Manure is not a friend of the phone. The company we take the phones to isn’t too fond of it either. We’ve dropped them in water, poop, mud and other numerous liquids. It’s a good thing Farmer is so handy. We have a phone morgue in the office where dead phones lie in rest and then parts are removed, repositioned and replaced. And yes, I do have to admit; I’ve laid hands on them and prayed for them.
The final phone folly I will share is about Farmer. We always say he drives like an old man. I personally think he drives that way to balance out the way I drive, but, that’s a whole ‘nother story.
Years ago, we purchased an old Suburban from my parents. Don’t know why, just did. Farmer was out side and for one reason or another laid his phone on the bumper of the “burb”. A while later he had to take home Son #4’s friend. Forgetting about the phone, he backed out of the driveway and proceeded. He drove ½ mile down the dirt road, another ½ mile on a main road, and up the driveway to drop off the friend. He then backed up, drove back up quite a steep hill and onto our bumpy dirt road and back home. A round trip of 2 miles or so. Some time later he was looking for his phone and realized he left it on the bumper. “It’s gone now” he thought. Well, not so my friend. It was right where he left it.
